Having a mental illness coupled with Firbromyalgia really sucks sometimes. I am so sore today I can hardle move and the gloomy weather is not helping the mood. Come on spring!! Yesterday, we took the tree down and went to the library. Before I got ill, that would not have been that big a deal. In fact, I could have come home and made some cookies or cooked dinner. Instead my back felt like someone had used it for a punching bag and my legs felt like jello.

This morning the kids wanted to do so much with me and I wanted to, yet my body is in so much pain I can barely get off of the couch. I feel helpless and inadequate as a mom. Talk about kicking off the PTSD feelings. I am so glad to have a husband who is so willing to take over where I cannot. He has gotton the kids breakfast and lunch. He has gone upstairs to check that the kids have finished what I asked. Without him, I do not know what I would do!!

I am so nervous about my interview tomorrow. I would really like to have a mental health service dog. My husband would not have to come along all of time and I could be more independent. I am also worried about the cost of the dog. The dog needs to be specially trained to be qualified as a service animal. The training is not cheap and then there is a two week period for me to train with the dog as well as follow ups. None of that is cheap. Yet, having a service animal would be helpful to me according to my therapist. My family set up a website for donations, however; no one seems to be giving. I realize that these are tough times for everyone, yet even 5 dollars would help. The service dog can cost between 10,000 and 30,000 depending on how much traing the animal needs. My last hospitalization cost that much. I would like to be able to pay off my bills, get the dog and live a life like everyone else.
My therapist feels that the dog would be a great help and may even get me to the point that I could return to some kind of part time job.TMy mental illness may not be who I am, yet it does affect what I can and cannot do. It affects how safe I feel in my home, it affects my memory, and it has affected my friendships. /p>


One thought on “What a Weekend!!

  1. Hi Jenn, first of all, thank you for following me on my blog.
    I can relate to so much of what you write! I too have PTSD and Fibromyalgia and the mental and physical pain together is really full-on!!
    I wish you all the best with your Service Dog. I have a dog (just a regular ordinary dog ;)) and she helps me so much by just being there and listening to me (ok, you’re probably thinking I’m weird now). I imagine a service dog would be very helpful in your treatment and recovery.
    Take care sweetie 🙂

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