For over 10 years my life has consisted of hospitals, therapists, psychiatrists, med changes, and everything else that has surrounded my mental health. It has been hard to relate to other people who have moved on with their lives or even just have a job. Also, due to my  mental illness, I only have visitation with my kids and it is limited.

I have thought about going back to school. Once again I am at an impass as to whether I do what I like or what I can get hired into. Right now, I just do not know. Taking my medication each day and not self-harming is still a struggle. What to do with my life seems like an impossible question to answer.

Over the past few weeks, I have been trying to go out of the house more. It has not worked. I know that my home is safe and I like that I know that if I stay in the house I will not see my abuser. Leaving the house means a chance to run into abusers as well as dissociate and get into an accident.

So, where do I go. Do I take baby steps and maybe take a craft class or do I jump back into school with both feet and try that again? I am just confused and overwhelmed!!

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