Why do I feel sorry for those that hurt me? I get angry at the wrong people and feel bad for others who I should be angry at.

***may trigger**

I want to harm myself to get it out. Anything to stop feeling. Numbness is where I want to be. I try so hard not to feel anything. Yet I wind up going off on the people who are trying to help me.

I harmed myself and told me therapist. I see my psychiatrist tomorrow and she may want me to go in the hospital. What is the hospital going to do other than keep me from harming myself.

In fact the other patients seem to be the only people that I can relate to and talk too. When I get out, I am alone again with no one to relate too. There are groups run by professionals for other illnesses. Not DID or PTSD. It is like we should just be able to go to weekly therapy and be ok. That is so not how it is!!

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