It has been increasingly hard to get up lately. My body is tired and my mind wants to fight off the emotions that are being stirred up by loss.
Having the kids has been good. I know that I have chosen a different path with them. The abuse has stopped. All they know is time out or their games being taken away from them. I do not want them to carry all of that pain with them.
Hyper vigilance. Hearing every little sound around me. The flashbacks and nightmares that I cannot stop even though I want to so badly.
Then there are those around me. Always wondering if they know or if I am acting in a weird way. Help comes in the form of therapy and the support from my husband. Even with that I feel lonely and misunderstood.