For a trauma patient, days are not merely a number on the calendar. They are often anniversaries of things that have happened. I wish I could say that they were positive.
There are a number of stresses right now. I am trying to take one day at a time, knowing that I have gotten through these times in the past using coping skills.
This year there are a few added stressors. My class is getting overwhelming that we have to work with another person in class and use their body as a surface for support. Just to put this in context, I cannot take someone brushing my shoulder in a store. I know it is something that I need to work on.
On top of that, I am losing a member of my treatment team. Every treatment provider is different and I will greatly miss this person and their way of treating patients.
This is also one of the first time that I will have the kids by myself. There is an internal struggle about how much of a mom I really am. I am worried that I am not going to be enough.
Then there are the feelings from the past that I am working on connecting with words. This work is still very new. Up until now, I have had a consistent problem with safety.
Outside, it is a nice day. I wished that translated to how I feel.