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Mother’s Day is this weekend. There was a point in time when I was in the hospital and asked for a pass to visit with my kids. It was my youngest child’s first Mother’s Day. It meant so much to me because I knew she was also my last baby.

The doctor told me that she did not think that a visit would be a good idea. Then she said that it was only a “Hallmark” holiday. That was so upsetting. Was that supposed to make me any less upset. Until then, I had not missed a Mother’s Day. 

Even after my divorce I was able to see my kids on Mother’s Day. That was until last year when my ex tried to take my kids away for good.

Since the fight last year to be able to see them, each time they visit is special. Sometimes I still get scared that he will try to take them away from me again. That some letter will come in the mail or someone will show up at the door.

This year, I am supposed to see them. We have plans to go out to lunch. Life is still a challenge as a mom. The people that they live with often talk negatively about me and say that I am not much of a mother and that they would be better off without me.

One day, the kids will be old enough to make the decision for themselves as to whether or not they want to see me. I hope that our relationship will continue. For right now, I am going to keep cherishing each time that they come to visit and each phone call.