Right now is a hard time for me. I feel as if my treatment team feels that I am hopeless. They do not exactly use those words, yet treatment resistant and what is the hospital really going to do for you seem close enough.
I feel in between the living. Just existing. Waking up and going through the day to go to bed. It is like being in auto pilot and is so numbing.
I miss my former psychiatrist. She has moved on to other opportunities, yet none of my current treatment team seems to understand me like she did. She actually met me halfway and did not distance herself. One could tell that she was genuine with her clients.
From not finishing nursing and social work, I know all to well about protocol. Even as a nursing student I would hold vitals if the client needed to talk. What is an extra 5 minutes if it makes someone feel better? What happens when you treat someone with a little bit of individualism?
I miss that about her. It was. It about the clock, but about the person. I could guarantee the appointments were backed up, yet I knew they were that way because someone else needed some extra time that day. I really miss the way she treated me as a patient. I wish that I could find someone that would be willing to do the same!